wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
either way he was missing a nipple.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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