I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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