I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
