I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
