thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
