That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
wat bout pragnant strippers??
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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