I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
