Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
