I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
