Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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