the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
