but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
