Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
