that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
