Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize