i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
as a side note pls kill me
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
