I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize