Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
