She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
