I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
pray to the hookup gods
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
