i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize