do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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