btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
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