I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize