At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
