But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
