and i looked up. we had an audience...
I understand Curling. That high.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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