...so i touched it.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
