i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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