There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
