did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
