At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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