...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
