.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
