so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
