You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
