I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
