Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
