Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
