when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
i now understand why vodka
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
