this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
