but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
