Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We had to coat check the pizza.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
