I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
