Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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