Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
