Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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