It's like God shit irony all over that family
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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