Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
