I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
