I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
