he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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