the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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